I Do NOT Have Swine Flu

So, amidst the media blitz regarding the swine flu, I show up to work today with some of the worst allergy symptoms I have had in quite some time. Due to pregnancy, there is only a certain range of medications I can take, and although I am "allowed" to take Benadryl, unless I want to be caught asleep at my desk, I have to forego. And so, I continue to sneeze, sniffle and have runny, itchy eyes, all of which, I understand, go along with the swine flu.

Anyways, I have noticed that no one has come into my office all day long, and people seem to be eyeing me funny. I also got a call from New York today, where I made the mistake of sniffling, and the person on the the other end said, "Do you have swine flu?" I am pretty sure this person was joking, because as far as I know you cannot contract swine flu over the phone, but I am not a doctor...

I take this opportunity now to state publicly, I do not have the swine flu.